Ever feel like you and your spouse speak different languages??? Do you ever get frustrated between what was actually said, what was intended and what was emotionally heard??? We already know "Men Are From Mars & Women Are From Venus" but there has to be a way for the 2 to truly become one!
The 5
Love Languages is an amazing tool by Dr. Gary Chapman designed to do just that.
He's spent 30 years conducting marriage counseling and has broken down the 5 different ways couples express
love and effectively communicate with each other. Learning how to improve communication with your
spouse will certainly help make the marriage healthy and the love stronger. It will create a common bond and a cycle of reciprocity. To take the assessment and learn your own love language, go to www.5lovelanguages.com.
Ok...now this is where I'm going to give you the look (0_O) Don't use this info to manipulate your significant or use it only to make up after you've blown it. There are some things you need to know about what the 5 love languages are not!
Physical Touch is NOT sex! It's NOT foreplay! And it most definitely is NOT harmful abuse!!!! (nuff said)
Acts of Service is not doing something for your spouse with the intent to receive praise! Either you're going to do it out of love or you shouldn't do it at all! This is not where you do something out of obligation or halfheartedly while huffing & puffing! This is an area where you can really go the extra mile...do more than expected! Doing the regular stuff around the house is great but doing something specifically for them (not the kids or family) is the cherry on top.
Receiving Gifts is not materialistic! It doesn't have to break the bank! This is truly where the statement "it's the thought that counts" comes into play. Don't worry about costs and don't give a gift you like, give the gift they would love!
Quality Time is not dragging your spouse along to what you want to do. It's about them! Whatever you plan, make sure you can actually carry it out. It doesn't count if you plan the time but it doesn't actually go anywhere o_O
Words of Affirmations is not the time to say hurtful, sarcastic, dumb things (even jokingly) and then following up with "I love you"! Seriously...not cool! Don't try to play the "I'm only kidding" card; insults are not easily forgotten. Even if this isn't your spouse's love language, who doesn't appreciate a good compliment?
OK...now that you know what it's not, go to the site and learn what the languages mean. Take the assessment and have your spouse do the same. Make it one of your Valentine Day activities and commit to learning each other's languages. There's even a fun Challenge you can complete..get the info HERE.
Physical Touch is NOT sex! It's NOT foreplay! And it most definitely is NOT harmful abuse!!!! (nuff said)
Acts of Service is not doing something for your spouse with the intent to receive praise! Either you're going to do it out of love or you shouldn't do it at all! This is not where you do something out of obligation or halfheartedly while huffing & puffing! This is an area where you can really go the extra mile...do more than expected! Doing the regular stuff around the house is great but doing something specifically for them (not the kids or family) is the cherry on top.
Receiving Gifts is not materialistic! It doesn't have to break the bank! This is truly where the statement "it's the thought that counts" comes into play. Don't worry about costs and don't give a gift you like, give the gift they would love!
Quality Time is not dragging your spouse along to what you want to do. It's about them! Whatever you plan, make sure you can actually carry it out. It doesn't count if you plan the time but it doesn't actually go anywhere o_O
Words of Affirmations is not the time to say hurtful, sarcastic, dumb things (even jokingly) and then following up with "I love you"! Seriously...not cool! Don't try to play the "I'm only kidding" card; insults are not easily forgotten. Even if this isn't your spouse's love language, who doesn't appreciate a good compliment?
OK...now that you know what it's not, go to the site and learn what the languages mean. Take the assessment and have your spouse do the same. Make it one of your Valentine Day activities and commit to learning each other's languages. There's even a fun Challenge you can complete..get the info HERE.
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